Recently I've realized that I'm an extremely obsessive person. Now a normal person has a few obsessions, and sometimes I think it's healthy to have a few obsessions in life. But I can't help but feel like sometimes I become overly, unnaturally, freakishly obsessive over random things.
It's to the point where I live and breath these obsessions, no matter what I'm doing or who I'm talking to, my mind always seems to drift to my current obession. And you know when you see other people obsessed over something, and then oftentimes the people around them become annoyed with this person and their obsession... I get annoyed with myself for being so obsessed with things, but I dont care... because I'm so obsessed!
For example, often times I'll obsess over music. I'll obsess over one song, ONE SONG, and listen to that one song over and over again on my iPod on a constant loop. I once listened to one song for two weeks straight. Halo, by Beyoncè. I couldn't listen to anything else. It was to the point where this song was like my drug. It was my brand of heroin. (so I went through a Twilight phase, so sue me)
I tried to listen to other songs, but It was like trying to switch to drinking tea when you are clearly addicted coffee. Cuz tea gives you the caffeine that you're looking for but it just doesn't live up to the sweet creamy bitterness that is coffee. Halo was my cofffee and any other song was tea. I even got annoyed by this song like I often do when I over listen to a song, but I just couldn't NOT listen to it. I was addicted.
Not listening wasn't an option, no matter how hard I tried. My life was the song Halo by Beyoncè. I'd wake up and listen to it, and fall asleep to it playing on my Pirates of the Carribean pillow speaker. Instead of my normal coffee in the morning, a car ride with Halo on loop would energize me for the day. For my half hour lunch break I'd be listening to my iPod. During my art class my inspiration was Halo. When I went on youtube I would look up karaoke versions of Halo so I could try to sing along.
I was living and breathing Halo and I just couldn't understand why I was obsessing over this song so much. Was it the lyrics? Was it the melody? Or was it simply the fact that Beyoncè's voice was just simply so hypnotic? Lord knows what it was but Halo had me under its spell and I couldn't get away from it. On some days I tried in vain to not listen to Halo, but some how my fingers would just drift towards putting Halo on loop.
But... You know... logically speaking, why WOULDN'T I be addicted to Halo. If I was gonna be addicted to a song why not just let it be Halo? I mean it's a good song right? Pretty popular on the music charts. Good lyrics, good melody. And who doesn't love a good Beyoncè song? I mean come on, she's a fabulous singer... Kanye West approved. Granted he's not the best person to judge sanity... But I mean he's not in an insane assylum so I'm pretty sure that counts for something.
Towards the end of my constant listening session of Beyoncè's Halo I decided, ah what the hell. I shouldn't have to fight it so hard because clearly this was what my brain wanted to listen to. If I'm stuck for the rest of my life wanting to only listen to Halo, my life could be way worse. And really dying to the song Halo would actually be kind of a good send off, in a morbid way of thinking. But it's just a phase right? Right. I'll get over it soon enough. And more than likely I do.
So as you can see, My life is often like listening to Halo. I obsess to the point where I'm annoyed by my own obsession. Then I'll come to accept my obsession and learn how to deal with it. But like an obsession one day i'll just drop what ever im doing like a hot potato, and I'm moved onto my new obsession: Love You Long Time by the Black Eyed Peas.
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